


Dean, Surrounded by Hearts

by Wine_Into_Water



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-05
Updated: 2010-08-05
Packaged: 2017-10-20 23:50:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/218442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wine_Into_Water/pseuds/Wine_Into_Water
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sammy has a crush.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dean, Surrounded by Hearts

Dean.

If Dean had known what Sam was up to, he would have rolled his eyes and called Sam a girl…or maybe punched him in the gut and called him a sick freak. Both, in Sam’s opinion, were viable options.

It wasn’t like Sam had planned for it to happen, it just did. One day, Dean is just his annoying, stinky brother with a big mouth and the manners of a barnyard animal...and the next, well, the next day, Dean’s smile is adorable, and he smells kinda good, and when he’s fresh out of the shower with water droplets sliding down his bare chest, Sam can admit he’s down right sexy. And that right there is Sam’s problem. He knows there are demons hiding in plain sight, and ghosts hidden in the shadows, vamp nests scattered over America…and still the world is not so fucked up that being in love with your big brother is normal. Even less normal is a twelve-year-old boy sitting in math class drawing little red hearts around his brother’s name in the middle of his math homework.

Really, it was all Shelby Miller’s fault -- she was the one to turn around and ask, “Hey, isn’t that your brother over there?” And Sam was a lot of things, but rude wasn’t one of them, so of course he turned and looked out the window to see if it was in fact Dean so he could answer Shelby’s question. Yes, yes it was Dean right across the street, in the high school yard, playing soccer. Soccer, of all things. Sam loved soccer…and watching Dean play, well that was like a wet dream come true. Running up and down the field, dodging and kicking, sweating and glistening, and cheering when he scored a goal.

“Yeah, that’s him.”

“Thought so. He’s hot.”

Sam was pretty sure he pulled off the annoyed little brother look well judging from the shrug of Shelby’s shoulders. “Well he is.”

He was. Dean was very hot, in that older rebel without a cause, bad boy with a heart of gold, muscley, freckly, green eyed, gorgeous kinda way.

He was so fucked.

The summer before, he had a crush on a girl named Christy; Sam thought she was cute and could appreciate her love of a good book. It wasn’t long before they moved away and Christy had just become a fading memory of a girl he once knew. It was easier that way. He would have liked to stay in one school the whole year through, lay down some roots, join a team, have some friends. Just have the regular Richie Cunningham kind of life. But disappearing had its advantages. It was easy not to crush on Christy when she wasn’t around, the typical out of sight out of mind scenario...but with Dean, it didn’t work that way. Every passing day, he fell more in love with his big brother, thought he hung the moon a little higher. To the point where his “Dean” with hearts all around it art turned into a full blown picture of two stick figures walking hand in hand, into the sunset.

He slammed his binder shut; God, he was a girl, a big fat sissy girl. If he was a cartoon, he’d be a giant puppy with big pounding hearts for eyes, his tongue hanging out and a puddle of drool forming at his feet. Dean had worked his way into his heart and mind so much that he couldn’t even crush on him in a manly way, and just focus on hot sex, which it was sure to be. Not that Sam had any experience in that area; hell, he hadn’t even been kissed yet, but he was sure being with Dean like that would be amazing…probably like the movies with the big sweeping music and lovey dovey cuddling and lots of kissing and touching…and there he was, being a big girly girl who had managed to get himself hard in the middle of math class.

He hated his life.

What he wouldn’t give to have a normal life… if not normal, then at least to be blessed with the normal thoughts and desires of a twelve-year-old boy. Sam never had many friends in his life, so he couldn’t be exactly sure, but he’d bet his lunch money that most twelve year olds didn’t spend the better part of their days crushing on their older, related by blood, brother.

He had lost track of time, not listening to the teacher and her spin on how fantastic the world of Algebra could be; instead, his focus remained on the field across the street and the boy he was hopelessly falling in love with.

Dean must have spotted him, or just sensed him watching -- Dean seemed to have a sixth sense for that -- but whatever the reason, he smiled and waved in Sam’s direction. Sam’s heart sped up, giddy with the fact that Dean noticed him and took the time to send him a wave even in the middle of a game, and then his heart seemed to come to a painful, screeching stop. He was being stupid, beyond stupid, the kind of stupid that got you killed on a hunt. Of course Dean loved him, he was sure there was nothing Dean wouldn’t do for him. Sam knew he was Dean’s top priority, he came first and foremost even over their own father, but Dean didn’t love him like that, not in the way Sam loved Dean. He never would, and Sam would never ask it of him.

Sam reached in his binder and ripped out the page of his declared love for Dean and crumpled it into a ball to throw out as the bell rang. The sooner he got over his crush for Dean, the better everything would be, for the both of them.

Of course, like everything else in Sam’s life, getting over that innocent, consuming love was easier said than done.


End file.
